Friday, April 18, 2008
so many things have happened. i dont know where i should start from.well, lets just start with .. my relationship, with her.hmm i feel that theres something wrong with US right now.hmm dont know where or what is the problem.maybe i dont love her anymore.or maybe, i know,perfectly, that we wun have any future.this relationship is going to be a short romance, just a remembrance. (ah wateva)its not going to end, is it??i just feel as insecure as ever.ever since, i kiss her.ever since i think that i love her.ever since, i first told her that i love her...we didnt really have a proper anniversary to celebrate the number of YEARS that we have been together ,for so long.we ,didnt .. appreciate it..or am i the one taking things for granted.well now, i kept on , treating her coldy.i guess shes used to it now.she dont care.she dont wish to bother.i think she gonna give up this relationship.should i feel happy about it ?but i still feel a tinge of sadness, and i cant seem to bear to let go.i know, my heart will ache ,if i were to see her to be another girl someday, or in the near future.i know, im too affected by her.i know, i gotta stand on my own.i know i shouldnt expect her to be here, with me, to overcome all of my problems.i gotta be independent.i gotta be strong, and stop myself from getting so affected by all the things she doher feelings, her problems, her verythingi gotta live for myselfi got to pamper myself moreif she loves me, she will try to know more about me.if she loves me, she will not neglect me, at all times and all placesif she loves me, she will wish to hug me and sayang me more, instead of just pressing me down on the bed, and ..kiss me, and thought that everything is going to be ok.if she loves me, she will know that, she has to spend more time on meif she loves me, she will pamper me moreif she loves me, she will look at me more, instead of looking at other girls/bungs when we are outsideif she loves me, she will not say that im uglyif she loves me, she will tell her friends that , im beautiful in her heart(isntit?)if she loves me, she will not forget about me, and just go into sleep.if she loves me, she will approach me when im getting all moody and gloomy.if she loves me, she will know when i need her accompany and when im jealouss.if she loves me, she will have the urge to see me soon and hear my voice before she goes to sleep.if she loves me, she will be able to fork out some of her time, just to spend some quality time with me.if she loves me, she wouldnt be calculating how much she has already spent on me.if she loves me, she will be interested in my life, and eager to know about my everydayif she loves me, she should have found this blog, right now.how come, i feel that theres a barrier between us.how come, i just cant go back to how we are like when we are just 2 secondary students.things got complicated.we aare no longer the ones that we used to be .whats L-O-V-E?
yammil posted 9:35 AM
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Wednesday, April 9, 2008
my online friend is right
i shouldnt be affected by the others
i should be the one affecting others
zz if she really dont care about me..
i should just leave her alone
i shouldnt bother her
i shouldnt think about her
shit
yammil posted 11:06 AM
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Tuesday, April 1, 2008
hi... im blogging
yammil posted 6:34 PM
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